“Blue jeans can still make you look attractive.” Marilyn Monroe
Well I’d go one step further and make the claim that they are the most flattering item of clothing full stop. But then I think there is nothing that can beat the causal sexiness of a pair of blue jeans and a white t-shirt. I mean I do love other clothes but there is just something about this look that will always be my favourite. So what is it about these ‘waist overalls’ as they were originally called, that is just so damn appealing? Is it that they are synonymous with our romantic image of the rugged cowboy, Gary Cooper or Roy Rodgers, sitting around a campfire, alone save for their majestic horse, the glow from the dancing flames casting mysterious shadows on the desert floor? Is it that they were the uniform of the dreamer, the original gold diggers; men who staked everything on finding those elusive golden nuggets ? Is it because of Jimmy Dean and his rebelling without any cause other than his just total ‘oh my god he looks so cool’ ness? Or is that thanks to Marlon Brando and Steve McQueen and the way thanks to them jeans bestow upon the wearer instant hippness, instant sex appeal?
Now I am also the first to admit that not all jeans are created equal. This is why when you find that perfect pair you tend to live in them, and even though they may have more holes than a swiss emmental, you are reluctant to part with them as finding a suitable replacement pair is akin to finding the holy grail. McQueen apparently had the same problem and was known to try on more than 30 pairs before he found the right ones, the ones that made his butt look good. I think it’s safe to say we all know what a pain in the ass it is trying to find the perfect pair, the pair that will make said ass look amazing. But when you do it’s like childbirth; the trauma and pain of labour melts away like ice cream on a hot day when you hold them in your arms and say ‘they’re mine.”
Jeans have morphed quite a bit over the years so now we have various leg shapes and a plethora of rises, colours or washes. Skinnies are the bane of my existence – I like them but they rarely like me – I am more of a traditionalist – straight leg with plenty of room to throw said leg over a horse or a motorbike before I ride off into the sunset. Well at least in my head anyway. And while I’m at I’ll throw in Cooper for a ride through the Santa Susana Pass (popular movie location for westerns in southern Cali) and Brando for a spin on the waterfront. All I ask for is a pair that will curve around the butt but then not cling, and therefore draw attention, to my thighs and calves. A pair you can lounge around in without fearing the dreaded plumber’s crack. In short, a pair that McQueen, “The King of Cool” would approve.